It’s a small world… I’ve never actually realised how small it is till I came back to Goa in November. I’ve made friends here and then learnt that they are also pretty close to the friend who travelled on the bus with you to college when you studied in Mumbai, or the person who sang high tenors in your a capella group. Or when you walk into the local multiplex and the person you’re with tells you that she’ll just be a minute, she wants to say hi to a friend. That friend turns out to be someone you haven’t seen or heard from in 10 years. Yeah, it indeed is a small world.
The connections you make in life, ever so often, remain long after you abandon them for different reasons. Not many of us would stop acknowledging people, unless of course, there was a difference of opinion. You reap what you sow. And when you plant a seed, it continues to flourish. Maybe I’m digressing a little bit, but basically, what I’m trying to say is, good friends never go away for too long.
Take, for example, one of my best friends who’s now in Dubai - we’d lost touch for a couple of years. But when I ran into her about six years ago, it was like things hadn’t ever changed, and it really never did. All that happened was that we’d drifted apart due to the distance between us. She’s getting married in four months and I’m the best man. Some things never change. People stay connected, bonds are established and life goes on.
Growing up isn’t easy. I’ve had to deal with rents and payments since I was 18. Some have had it worse; some haven’t had it at all. Some people live sheltered lives; some people get thrown out into the big bad world, feet first. Some learn how to deal with problems, some learn by falling flat on their face and then picking themselves up and walking. I know of someone who lost her parents when she was 12 and had to bring up her younger brother and go through college and make a career for herself at the same time. Another friend of mine ran away from military school in America because he wanted to do something else. Today, he’s a great chef and he doesn’t regret working tables at a restaurant, because at the end of the day, struggle makes you what you are. The trick is to keep breathing.
You realise where you’re going only when you stop to smell the roses. Running through life, trying to prove someone else wrong is not the best way to do things. It’s only when you’ve been down and out that you learn to appreciate the good part of life, because you know how hard and how long it sometimes takes to get to a point where you don’t have to worry about your next meal. And then, the people around you, the people who pick you up when you’re down, who call you up way past their bedtime; just to make sure you’re ok, the people who selflessly watch your back, not because they might have anything to gain, but because they care. Then, no matter how dark it gets, they’re always there to turn on the lights. That light at the end of the tunnel — it’s them standing there waiting to pull you out of the depths of your own dark hole.
I’ve gone through life often for a bit hitching a ride on someone, leaning on someone’s shoulder, not just financially, but more so emotionally. And many of us have all done it the same way. To see a smiling face and an outstretched hand just when you’ve given up hope is a refreshing sight. And at the end of the day, I would count my riches, not by how much money I have in my bank account, but by how many people I’m connected to, how many people look at me and with a knowing smile, silently let me know that they’ve got my back. I’m there for them too and they know that. It’s a give and take relationship of a different kind. It doesn’t matter who comes out of it with more in hand, what matters is that you come out. This is a tribute to the people who care, the friends who’ve always been there when you need them and who’ve walked the line, no questions asked. Take a bow!
Jan 25, Gomantak Times, Goa
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